Being a father has been the most challenging and humbling experience of my life. I’ve dedicated most of my adult life towards healing and self awareness, and yet nothing prepared me for the onslaught of emotional anguish that arrived with the birth of my son. As a stay-at-home dad, I’ve been immersed in parenting, and within the first year of my son’s life, I reached rock bottom, my lowest emotional point in this lifetime. I was forced to surrender my notions of who I thought I was, break out of the illusion that I don’t need help, and attempt to address the shameful and inconvenient parts of myself that I preferred to keep hidden forever. I reexamined my childhood, my relationship with my parents, and am attempting to disrupt the intergenerational trauma that negatively impacted the way I was raised. As a father, I’ve been covered in feces and urine, exhausted beyond belief, and emotionally triggered in ways I never knew possible. And, I’ve lived to tell about it. Not only have I survived, I’ve formed a beautiful, secure attachment with my child, and I‘m ready to share my story.